Radio Transcript

LIFE ISSUES NO. 1360

 GLORIA SWANSON - Part II

  Yesterday I related part of the story of one of yesterday's famous movie actresses, Gloria Swanson, as she related it in her autobiography.

 Unknown to her worshiping public, she had had an abortion, and it had deeply troubled her.  Near the end of the book, here's what she said, and I quote:

 "The greatest regret of my life has always been that I didn't have my baby, Henri's child, in 1925.  Nothing in the whole world is worth a baby.  I realized this only after it was too late, and I've never stopped blaming myself."  

 Late in her life she went to Japan, and let me quote her again about this:  "At a Buddhist temple at a place called Kyo San, or Honorable Mountain, our guide and a Buddhist monk led us up through the most timeless, peaceful landscape I have ever seen--asleep or awake--a mountain forest of giant cedars with a network of pathways lacing the area and ancient graves everywhere.  At one point I noticed a tiny stone figure near the massive roots of one of the cedars, and then another.  And then I realized that there were hundreds with little cloth bibs around.

 "What are these?" she asked.  The guide said, "Babies".  He crouched down for a closer look at one stone and said, "This baby's life was ended before he was born."  Gloria Swanson goes on - she says:  "Then he and the monk must have seen how deeply moved I was for they showed me how to pay respect in that place.  They gave me a dipper of water and indicated that I should pour it over the tiny stone figure.  Then I burned the incense the monk gave me and left some grains of rice.

 "As I stood up, I was crying fresh tears out of the guilt I had carried for 54 years."

 Can you imagine her heartache for 54 years?  All I can say is, "Gloria Swanson, you poor woman."  And yet, how many ordinary people back then, secure in the happiness of their own marriages and children, didn't look at this glamorous movie queen and literally turn green with envy, when, in so many ways, she would have been more than willing to trade places with them.

 But for Gloria Swanson there is an additional tragedy in that, with what we know today and today's proper counseling, she could have been helped to cope with what she had done.  But, back then, no one knew anything about post-abortion syndrome, and, of course, she didn't seek anyone's help. 

 A few years ago, my dear wife Barbara and I were in Japan lecturing, and while there we visited a large Buddhist temple.  Near it were rows upon rows, hundreds (maybe thousands) of these stone dolls, each one about 15" tall, each with a hand-made (usually crocheted) cap and jacket.  And held in each little right hand was a little colorful pinwheel.  It was an unforgettable sight.  In addition, most had personal messages at their feet - sorrowful messages from their parents.

 And so we know, at least a little bit, how Gloria Swanson felt, but we didn't have that burden of an abortion behind us like she did.

 [09/20/96]